The Many Faces of 26.2

It's been just over a week since I completed the 2014 Dublin Marathon. That day, I thought to myself 'I have so much to write about...' And then as each day passed, I felt all the thoughts, emotions and lessons that would make a great race report and blog post start to fade. So I'm going to dig for all that and still try.

There are these people. And then there are these people. I am not sure if this post is for the people who have no idea why others train for long distances and may or may not care, the ones who think it's about bragging (like bitter 13.1 sticker man...sad, sad man), people who might be intrigued by how it can change you or for those people who know exactly what it's like. But I had a friend suggest I blog about this seemingly emotional event, so even if it's just for you and me, friend, I'm ok with that. I don't want to forget this one. 

In the 6 marathons I've registered for, I don't think I had ever registered for one 10 months before the event. WHY would I do that?? I later wondered. We had just moved to the UK and I was eager to get back to marathon training after over a year and apparently really EAGER to make that official. A marathon in Dublin? Nothing about that sounded like it could be bad.

And then my 10-month struggle to adjust to running on the local terrain began. Some of you already know, or have at least tried to understand my whining, about why I kind of stopped enjoying it. You don't really need to know the details....just that I hated it. I was the most out of shape I had been in....as long as I could remember, and I'm pretty sure my mindset was too negative from the beginning. Once I realized I did not have the perfect Kansas running conditions I was used to, I guess I decided it was my way or no way. This was going to suck.

I had ups and downs, periods when I felt motivated to get back on the training track before derailing again. Just hang on to whatever fitness I'd acquired so far, but not drastically improve my endurance and definitely not speed. And certainly not any kind of combination of the two.

I knew from all of my previous marathon training that this was not good. Up until this point, I had improved during every marathon. I had learned a lot training for each one, and then quite a bit during the race as well. In my opinion, for me personally, I had smoked the Marine Corps Marathon in October 2012. But I also knew how hard I had trained. And I was nowhere near that level this time. I told myself Just Do It, but it wasn't working. I basically just accepted my motivation problems but also felt bad. I was even letting my I Run 4 buddy, Kaden, down.

As the marathon approached, I was counting the days until it was over. That is no way to feel about a race that takes several hours. I was bummed I had to give up the BQ goal, and even more bummed I wasn't even sure about breaking 4 hours. For me personally, it felt like there was no reason to run another marathon unless I at least had the chance to improve my time. Shit happens on race day, but insufficient prep and training feels like failing. Hence, just wanting to get this whole experience over with.

But I'm also experienced enough as a runner (and maybe wise enough at 29) to realize that was not a good way to approach the whole thing. Things hadn't gone the way I wanted, but there were several things to focus on. I'm always thankful for my ability to run, and then to be able to travel to Ireland to participate in a marathon through a beautiful city? Heck yes. I even thought about walking it with a Camelbak of Guinness, but that really seemed like taking the easy way out.

The night before the race, I was lying in bed flipping through the program. I read through a section titled "20 Tips for the Road" by Conor O'Hagan. Number 19 read: Have a Plan B. There may come a point where you realize your target has slipped away from you....by having a secondary target - perhaps 30 minutes slower- you could keep the motivation you need to press on..."

I wasn't even sure what my target was at that point, so I knew I needed to be flexible no matter what I decided. Ultimately breaking 4 hours was still my goal, but when sharing my doubts with a friend before the race, he said "you'll at least break 4:30."

A little play-by-play:

Like an idiot, I started with the 3:50 pace group. I knew it was a stretch at the time, but looking back, it was actually....stupid. 4:00 would have been more reasonable, but now I know not to let the race day adrenaline get the best of me and override simple logic and numbers that make sense based on my training.

I started out at an 8:35 pace. Also not appropriate. I watched the 3:50 pacers run past me at I think mile 5 or 6. Plan B set in, because who was I kidding anyway?

Mentally, I was already telling myself to just keep a good pace through the half. Beat 2 hours and you're still a star!

False logic, really, if I wanted to be able to actually run the whole thing. Though I'm still not sure that if I had slowed down my pace then that I would have made it longer before walking/running. I knew what was missing in my training was time on my feet (running).

I pushed out the half in 1:59:34.

I broke down mentally. I texted during a race, for the first time ever. I told Dave I didn't know if I would finish....I never even thought that during my first marathon. My thoughts were toxic, but I was in pain and couldn't imagine running the rest or being on my feet for the time it would take to walk the rest. He sent me some love and I kept going.

At mile 15.17, I was walking. I was at a low, mostly mentally but obviously physically. A man ran up behind me, put his hand on my shoulder, looked me in the eye and said "let's go." It broke my little freaking running heart. I don't know why. Don't get me wrong, the crowd was loud and there was a lot of support in general. But I had walked by a lot of spectators and a lot of people had run by me...this guy noticed. I don't know if he picked me or if he picked all the walkers but I felt the strong support of a fellow runner. I realized he knew my pain and knew I could overcome it.

I realized the power of running with others. If only I had gotten a training buddy for this marathon...most people do. I just enjoy running alone. Until I'm totally unmotivated, and then maybe it's not so good. Duh. 

I had to pee for several miles....that has never happened before (because I'm a sweat MACHINE) and threw me off as well. I waited 2 minutes for a port-a-john at mile 17 and after that decided it was time to get on with it. At 19 miles I saw my buddy again, walking. I realized it was him as I passed, turned and ran back to him and told him I remembered him. We exchanged some encouraging words.

I probably walked more than I needed to, but at that point I wasn't racing for a time, really. I was and I wasn't. I was doing a lot of thinking while I walked....a lot of reflecting about how this all made me feel.

I was not satisfied, but I was also not beating myself up. I realized I really, really missed the feeling I had during the Marine Corps Marathon. When I was in such good shape that I fully embraced all the pain, mentally and physically. I could push so hard during the race because I was prepared and I loved that. I almost passed out after because even though I had taken a lot of fuel during the race, I had obviously left everything I had out there. I thought a lot about how I missed running that hard and missed the good kind of pain.

I wasn't enjoying the unprepared kind of pain.

I'm convinced I would have kept hating running until I was disappointed in a race.

I guess I still need to figure out a way to enjoy training where I am, but I either figure that out or stop running marathons, and that is not what I want.

That is what I learned.   

I was fighting tears for a couple hours afterward. I don't know why I was fighting them, they were good. I felt alive again. 

When talking about the race with a friend a couple days later, and still comparing it to "my last marathon," he said "You were a different person then..."

How true is that? Are we ever the same people we were 2 years ago? Probably not. So I finished 32 minutes slower but learned a lot about my passions, how mentally tough (or not tough) I am, what I want to get out of my races, how to adjust goals and the value of fellow runners. I've always known the value of volunteers but I felt a new level of appreciation for them that day. Last time all I learned was that proper training pays off, and I already knew that ;-) And hey, at least I beat 4:30 according to my old running buddy's prediction. It's like he knows me.

I've had a 26.2 magnet for a few years now. It's on the side of my fridge & reminds me of the journeys I've taken to push my body's limits. It holds up my current training plans. I could put it on my car. It doesn't really matter. That's really all I have to say about the magnet. It's not about the magnets or the stickers. 

We take on these challenges to become stronger & learn more about ourselves. I wish everyone knew & appreciated the joy in finding something so challenging, painful and wonderful that makes you grow, so if you don't have something in your life that does for you, find it.  And don't ever give up, fellow runners. 

Optimistic, happy, sad, in pain, happy (again!), 
determined, exhausted, proud. 
When is the next marathon?

Rowing Regatta Rookies

regatta

rɪˈgatə/

noun

noun: regatta; plural noun: regattas

1. a sporting event consisting of a series of boat or yacht races 
   
   (per Google)
   
   
   I asked some of my teammates if they knew what "regatta" actually meant as we were standing around waiting to race at our first "regatta." Does it mean "race?" No one knew. We are so new. 
   
   Eventually we will know what we are doing, but for this regatta (held in St. Ives), me and my fellow "Learn to Row" teammates entered into an "Explore Rowing" event held at lunchtime. We gathered....it's basically intended to be lunchtime entertainment for the real rowers. 
   
   Our coach Teresa told us about 4 weeks ago that we had our first "race" on 21 June. We all laughed.....doesn't the course end 7 June? :) It was far enough away that I ignored the fact that I was still trying to stroke and not fall out of the boat at the same time. 
   
   So Saturday rolled around. Beautiful sunny day on the river. None of us has been in a quad. None of us had rowed together. Not once. But our names were drawn out of a hat to create 2 teams of 4, and we got in the boat when they called us up and we rowed. Regardless of what happened in the water, it was warm, sunny, fun and there was really good food and drink available. It was fun hanging out with each other outside of Saturday practice & observing the rowing community in action.
   
   Our competition was clearly not as "new," being fairly coordinated and having matching uniforms (too legit). So, we did not win. But we rowed for 200 meters, together, and didn't capsize.  We weren't THAT far behind, and they showed excellent sportsmanship as we crossed the finish line as they hooted and hollered at us. 
   
   Now that the class is over and we are all joining the club for the rest of the season, I'm looking forward to actually working on communication in the boat and coordinating strokes. It was obvious to most of us that was lacking going into the race, but we went with it and were good sports. The competitive edge will come. And more regattas! Now that I know what that means. It means rowing, fun, good people and maybe a beer and good sausage (not a Bratwurst...Bratwurst is German, Dave was told when he ordered for me). 
   
   
   

   

   Click to Enlarge. We're still super tiny. 

   
   

   
   

   Photo & food delivery credits: Dave!
   

Cupcakes & Salads

If baking has become a relaxing stress reliever, does that mean I am getting old? I don't know. But I can definitely see why so many people cook, bake and blog. I could do this all day.

I've been having somewhat of a...cupcake obsession.

I guess it started a couple weeks ago when I made some Margarita Cupcakes. Oh. Em. G.

I can't do more than pictures for you here.  Just make them!

 

My first attempt at making Vegan Vanilla Cupcakes failed. NOT BECAUSE OF THE RECIPE. Because my experiement with the recipe. They were going to be for a friend's 1 year old's b-day par-tay that we didn't end up making it to. I made them with almond flour instead of all purpose...an unplanned and fatal move for the cupcake. I didn't realize I was out of all purpose flour and had just bought (the really expensive) almond flour to experiment with a couple other low carb recipes. I even googled substitution rules, thinking I was avoiding the upcoming disaster. This one:

The only precaution I took was adding more baking powder. As the "cupcakes" were bubbling and overflowing, they smelled awfully good. Seriously. So I decided to scrap out this mixture into a bowl and taste it. I ended up with what I would call somewhat of a very tasty almond crumble crisp.

I would have to refine the recipe to avoid another volcanic overflow of the muffin pan, but I thought "maybe I'm on to something here...." Just not cupcakes.

Round 2 with all purpose flour worked much better. 

Wa-la! Delicious. Except the frosting was kind of off. Probably because I used coconut oil instead of shortening, and it wanted to melt. Delicious flavor, though. 

My obsession has apparently also applied to my choice in dog treats. I got home after buying these and thought 'what is up with the cupcakes?!'

Ok, let's get healthy. 

A friend recently sent me an article with a bunch of healthy living tips and reminders, one being "Decorate Your Plate." I'll be honest, I didn't have the article in mind per se when I threw this salad together, by it is super colorful and healthy and delicious. I made it 5 times this week. Romaine lettuce, tomatoes, cucumber, green onion, sliced almonds, some (ok maybe too many) sunflower kernels, chickpeas, BLUEBERRIES and some lite balsamic dressing. I'll be honest...it's pretty amazing. Add chicken or salmon.

And the workout recovery drink I've been making for post-Insanity....COLOR! I stole it from here. But the color really is energizing.  

Yesterday I did a local 4-mile road race, and then I ate another cupcake. I guess I'm not completely over it. Ok the race isn't REALLY relevant to the cupcake. But I did run really. hard. After, I went wedding dress shopping with a friend and we went to this bakery recommended by her boss. SNICKERS!

Jrae's Snickers Cupcake.  Token Oreo cake pop.  

Today was my rest day for Insanity. But I have regularly been thinking about engaging my core more in everyday activities, I found myself doing squats as I knelt down to wrap the vacuum cord up this morning and I just started doing the Heisman in the kitchen while waiting for water to boil earlier this evening...a healthy kind of addiction, Shaun T-brainwash I think. Loving Insanity and feeling fantastic. Thanks, Shaun T.

I love the colorful fruits and veggies, but I LOVE cupcakes and Insane workouts. Be healthy and enjoy life. Balance.

Rev3 Williamsburg Race Report

I'm now a few weeks into a new fitness journey (Insanity....loving it, actually.  I just think Shaun T should affiliate himself with a different company:)). I thought I better wrap up my Rev3 triathlon race report before I forget that fun little adventure.  Race day was completely exciting and enjoyable.  A blast! I totally stole this race report format from an Ironman finisher, too.  This is pretty detailed, so maybe those thinking of doing a tri will learn a few things and experienced triathletes may just be amused.

REV3 WILLIAMSBURG OLYMPIC TRIATHLON

LEVEL 1: PREPARATION
As we prepared to leave for the almost 3-week trip to Virginia, Michigan and then Chicago, I tried to have my priorities straight and first made sure to use my USA triathlon membership card race day checklist, along with the one provided by Rev3, to make sure I was packing everything I needed for the race.  This was way more complicated than preparing for a run.  I guess I knew this from doing the sprint tri a couple years ago, but this triathlon was across the country not across the street, and I didn't want to forget anything critical.  Like my bike.  Plus all the little things.  In the end I did forget little things, like baby powder.  But nothing too expensive that I couldn't grab after we left Kansas.

Real preparation started when we got to Woodbridge, VA.  When we could finally stop driving, see our good friends and relax for an evening before driving down to Williamsburg.  Being able to relax of course starts out with getting the dogs a little worn out.  We met Jack at a dog park by their house where Teddy and Ellie met up with Tater.  Jack and Angela took us to dinner at Cock and Bowl, a quaint little European bistro in Occoquan.  Mussels and 60+ Belgian-style beers.  Sounds like race prep to me.  

This also included Friday's crash course on changing a flat given by Dave & Jack.  I said many small prayers that I wouldn't have to change my first during this race.

LEVEL 2: PRE-RACE
Pre-race started when we got to Williamsburg late Friday after fighting lots of traffic (this happens throughout the entire state of Virginia, during all times of the day.  You can't get away from it).  When we arrived, I loaded up on a 1/2 pound of carrot cake at a bistro called Second Street.  Nik ate the other half.  We had each ordered a "piece" not realizing it was Colassal, so the waiter made a good assumption that we only needed one. Funny.  And it was fabulous. A 1/2 lb was plenty...I didn't need to be hulling around a carrot cake in my stomache Sunday morning. Oh yeah, I had Quail for dinner.  Dave drank a bottle of wine.  I was "good" and had one local brew.

   We headed back to the hotel to get some sleep so we could get up for the practice swim.  Fast forward to the morning.  This is when it got real! It was a long, fun day of prep.  First we drove out to T1 (transition 1....where you get on your bike after getting out of the water)/the water.  It was then that I realized my packing was horrible as usual and that things were not properly organized.  I had a bunch of stuff in my bag that I didn't need to take down there, making the bag heavy.  A massage stick, extra clothes, extra goggles, caps, etc.  Note- don't use the bag you want to carry around as storage for everything you brought.  So I was just throwing stuff everywhere in the back of Dave's truck. A sight, I'm sure.

It was about a 5 minute walk down to the water at Jamestown Beach Park.  Triathletes were swarming everywhere.  Some getting in the water, some getting out, some just looking at the water :)

View of starting area

People were visiting and talking about triathlete things....things that were probably not even thoughts in my little triathlete rookie mind.  But the biggest topic of conversation was "wetsuit or no wetsuit."  I had paid to reserve/rent one a couple weeks before, in my mind assuming we would definitely need them and not really thinking about the possibility of not needing them.  At dinner Nik had told me that the water temperature was borderline for the rules.  The USA triathlon rule states:

4.4 Wet suits. Each age group participant shall be permitted to wear a wet suit without penalty in any event sanctioned by USA Triathlon up to and including a water temperature of 78 degrees Fahrenheit. When the water temperature is greater than 78 degrees, but less than 84 degrees Fahrenheit, age group participants may wear a wet suit at their own discretion, provided however that participants who wear a wet suit within this temperature range shall not be eligible for prizes or awards. Age group participants shall not wear wet suits in water temperatures equal to or greater than 84 degrees Fahrenheit. The wetsuit policy for elite athletes shall be determined by the USAT Athletes Advisory Council. The AAC has set the wetsuit maximum temperature for elite athletes at 68 degrees for swim distances less than 3000 meters and 71.6 degrees for distances of 3000 meters or greater. Any swimmer wearing a wetsuit with a thickness measured in any part greater than 5 millimeters shall be disqualified.

So, there ya go.  After Nik headed in the water Jack and I walked in.  I didn't have my wetsuit yet because we were picking them up later that day.  I hadn't been too concerned about how the water would feel since Nik told us it was almost 78 degrees anyway.  It felt so good! After getting used to swimming while looking at blackness below me again, I swam out to the first buoy just to see how far that felt.  By then, I was thinking there is no way I would want to be wearing a wetsuit at this temperature.  Interesting! Like I said, I hadn't even thought of this scenario as a new triathlete a bit overwhelmed and unfamiliar with all the ins and outs.

Post-practice swim

We got breakfast at a bakery called Aromas in historic colonial Williamsburg.  I had the breakfast burrito with Chorizo. Right choice.  So good.  We walked around the quaint little downtown area, which literally took about 6 minutes :) We then headed to the "expo," near T2 (the area where you drop off your bike and start running during the race).  We checked in and picked up our registration packets/bags full of crap we needed....athlete wristband, race number bib, body marking tattoos, timing chip, bike stickers, swim to bike bag, dry clothes bag.  Being a triathlete is complicated :). It took me a while to wrap my head around the idea of the "swim to bike" and "dry clothes" bags, both of which were for T1.  But no bag for T2?  The dry clothes bag was for the stuff you were wearing in the morning before hopping in the water.  The swim to bike bag was for stuff like cap, goggles and wetsuit after getting out of the water.  Simple enough, I guess.  But what about T2?? Haha.  Here is T2:

T2

It was time to go back to the hotel and grab our bikes, which needed to be dropped off back at T1 where we had been that morning.  Back and forth, back and forth (it was about 6 miles between the 2 locations).  As we were loading up the bikes, Jack noticed a gash in one of Nik's tires.  Oh s***.  This stuff does happen right before the race, people! So we went back to the expo where there is a bike mechaical support team.  Nik's bike goes in the queue.  When it was ready we took the bikes down to T1 and dropped them off in the swarm of bikes, to be guarded by some Marines overnight.  So weird to have so many crazy expensive bikes in one location overnight.

T1

We ate some seriously fabulous Italian food at Maurizio's (you can see that food is critical to my race weekend experience. Duh :)  I seriously fought the urge to get just one fabulous glass of wine to go with it....I beat the urge.  We were running out of time to get a good night's sleep.  We headed back to the hotel at about 8:30 and the rain had started.  I don't think that during all of the race prep chaos I had even BOTHERED to think about the weather.  Or I at least wasn't tracking it that day.  And apparently in my mind it was obviously going to clear up by morning.  Obviously.

LEVEL 3: RACE DAY
My alarm went off at 4:15.  The adrenaline reminded me that hitting snooze and sleeping longer than I should would only add to my nerves, so I popped out of bed and got dressed.  Lights on.  Nik made pancakes (I don't know how many triathlons it takes to build that step into your 4 a.m. wake up routine, but wow).  And we notice it is raining.  Grreeaat.  I'm still not panicking....just do what everyone else does, Breanne.  Nik was ready to leave on time, I was almost ready and Jack was definitely not ready  :-p Dave drove us down to T2 (to drop off stuff at our spot where we start the run) at about 5:20.  It was raining good....luckily I found a plastic grocery bag in the door of Dave's truck to throw my shoes and socks in....HOW DID I NOT PLAN FOR THIS? Haha.  Shocking.  Although let's face it, I was the one still grabbing baby powder for my feet at 8:45 the night before.  Most people had big garbage bags.  I felt like such a newb!

We got in line for the shuttle to take us to T1, but it was very very long and we were just becoming a soppy mess.  Excellent.  While Dave parked, Jack and I made the best of standing in line and we spent most of the time waiting talking to an older couple who noticed my U of M shirt.  They had a Michigan connection and loved to watch U of M swimming.  The woman was watching her husband race the Olympic distance.  Just a really friendly couple.  Really helped distract me from the fact that I wanted to puke as I got nervous.  We finally got on the bus shortly after Dave walked a mile from where he parked (seriously, so many logistics....yet I still found this race pretty awesome).  As the bus pulled away, someone said "well, we made it on the bus.  that's the first hurdle."  Without missing a beat, Jack yelled "what? there's hurdles in this race??" Everyone busted out laughing.  The comic relief was good at that point because everyone was a little on edge about the long line and the shuttles being backed up.  T2 was supposed to close at 6:40 (meaning you had to have everything set up in that area by that time...the dry clothes bag and swim to bike bag, and be out of there).

SWIM
We made it out of T1 with some time to spare, but they did have to leave it open a little longer as buses of athletes were still en route.  We went to the bathroom one last time, threw a bunch of sunscreen on and walked from T1 to the water (a good 1/4 to 1/2 mile as well, haha).  At this point I realized I didn't have any water with me and of course was thirsty.  There was a table of drinks and volunteers set up for the transition and they gave me some gatorade.  The race start was delayed a little bit, but the rain had stopped and that was pretty awesome.  The Half distance racers started first in waves by age and gender.  They closed the gap between waves from 5 min to 3 to make up for a little lost time.  Um, I had to go to the bathroom again pretty close to our start times.  Jack made the "joke" that those hanging out in the water were taking care of business and I don't think I caught it at first.  It wasn't until I actually took his advice and went and sat down in the water that it occurred to me....that is why people are sitting in the water.  Yup.

I watched the waves start in front of me and got more nervous/excited.  I lined up in the chute when the announcer gave us the 3 minute warning.  I pressed my goggles onto my face and threw Dave a couple smiles.  The announcer counted down to our start and I casually started walking out into the water after crossing the timing mat, getting my bearings.  I walked as far as I could, why not.  I remember being paranoid that the chip tied around my ankle would fall off during the swim.  Between constantly checking that, looking to make sure I was going the right direction, looking to make sure I wasn't about to plow over someone (only happened once), there was enough to focus on during the swim.  The current was pushing us out a bit, so that helped a little from the start to the first buoy.  But then you had to make a right, and then another right to get back to the beach.  So the water pushing us out on the second and third legs was not helpful.  Too confusing? Anyway, I just kept thinking about how I swam to the island on the Big Manistique Lake as a kid.  This was cake! It helped me to not freak out.  After turning around the second buoy, people were fairly spread out.  And I had to pee again! I quickly thought...pee now while still swimming- 2 birds with one stone.  Or waste time in the porta-potty when I get out and lose momentum? I looked behind me to make sure I wasn't peeing in someone's face.  I was considerate.   

Finishing the swim

T1
It was a great feeling running out of the water with everyone there cheering.  I ran over the mat and followed the path across the field to T1.  I was trying to move at a pretty good clip, but in the back of my mind I was also thinking "shit, this is the bike."  I wanted to get clipping into my bike OVER WITH.  Between running from the water to T1, getting my shoes, gloves and helmet on and getting to the mounting line, I used 7 1/2 minutes.  Not bad (for me).  I ran my bike up to the road, passed the mounting line and hopped on.  This was it! I was on.

BIKE

Starting the bike

This is what really sticks out in my mind from the bike:  Me going pretty damn slow.  A lot of people passing me, some even asking me if I was ok, especially when I would stop just so I could take water from my water bottle (people were SO nice).  Everyone being so spread out that sometimes I wondered if I was even on the correct route.  The moment I realized that while the interesections were blocked off, the roads weren't closed and a couple cars seemed to be those ones who don't care about bikers (I was always as far to the right as I could be...cars scare me).  The lady who decided to pass me ON A SHORT HILL and then not give me the required distance between us (3 bike lengths).  Instead, she passed me and then drastically slowed down right in front of me....on the hill.  I thought I was going down.  Seeing the sign for 14 miles and thinking I had gone more like 20.  The Rev3 signs that said  "CAUTION," but nothing else.....what was ahead?!?! And the volunteer who was yelling "rough road ahead" after I had just gone over what I would call rough road.....so really, what was ahead?? I breaked on a lot of hills.  And the sweet relief of being at the end and knowing all I had to do was dismount and run :)

 T2
This one was pretty simple....throw shoes, visor and running belt on and go! Apparently it only took me 1:05.  I still wonder if this is accurate, but I don't think I wasted too much time.

RUN
I really tried to keep my pace up in the beginning because it is easier to get a good pace and hold it than start slow and then feel tired anyway.  I knew once I got to the turn-around at 3.1 (it was an out and back) I could definitely let my mental strength carry me.  For the Half distance athletes, the run route was the out and back x 2.  That sounded a bit like mental torture to me, but it was really cool seeing all the athletes at different points along the course.   You were constantly passing runners going in the opposite direction.  I really pulled from my running strength as well as the strength I was watching in others to get me through the 6.2 miles.  I felt pretty good overall.  The last 1.5 was rough, to be expected.  What was really awful was getting back to the finish line area/chute and having to go past it, run down another hill and then back up before actually going down the chute.  These race organizers were sick! Haha.  At the athlete briefing the day before, the guy said "there are a few hills along the run course to keep the athletes honest." Hilarious.  A few? It was very hilly.  But a good challenge for me.

LEVEL 4: FINISH
It was so awesome getting to the chute.  Rev3 is big on allowing athlets to run down the chute with their loved ones.  I wish I would have thought of this and grabbed Dave! But it felt so good finishing and I didn't have much left I guess.  The announcer mentioned my name as I came through, but then immediately after crossing the mat and slowing down, the second place male pro finisher  (yes, for the Half distance....more than double what I did :) was finishing and totally stole my race finish thunder! Haha.  The finish area was split into two lines on the left and right.  I was in the slightly backed up right line (as people got towels, medals and shirts), and one of the volunteers said I could go to the other side.  That would have required walking across camera and interrupting the pro finisher interview.  Maybe that was my moment of fame and I should have taken it, hehe.  But then no one gave me a medal and I was starting to wonder if they were only for the Half finishers.  It was like panic set it...this would have been so upsetting!  Then a lady finally asks me what size shirt, and asks me if I got a medal.
*Sigh of relief.*
I wanted some Williamsburg bling for my first Olympic distance race.

LEVEL 5: POST-FINISH

I snapped a few photos with Dave, my support crew.  We waited for Jack to finish to cheer him on.  We got some pasta and salad, and then watched more finishers.  Watching people finish was a lot of fun.  Great atmosphere.  People finished with their spouses, kids, newborn babies, unborn babies/pregnant wives, dogs.  The best one to watch was a lady who raced with her special needs daughter.  She pulled her in a kayak, she pulled her on her bike and she pushed her in a running stroller on the run.  I get choked up just thinking about it.  Here she is finishing:

 Yes, I do it all for the bling.  And having fun with friends.  And seeing amazing people like Jenna above, along with people who overcome all sorts of obstacles in training and racing to finish. And the post-finish beer.

Cheers to more triathlons in the future!

My Results

Now if you want, back up with me.  My training journey wasn't really a blast, but it is important for me to reflect on it because in the end it was worth the pain.  Every time I train, I learn.  And so should you!

After the USMC Marathon, I was in pretty awesome shape.  But then, in post-marathon fashion, I sort of got lazy.  I took a "break." A 2 month break.  When we got to Washington, I was really looking forward to building up my fitness level before my official tri training began.  I got back in the pool after many years.....weird.  I biked (spinned) my butt off in the safety of the gym, all the while thinking about the clipless pedals I would have to eventually face.  And of course, I ran.  Outdoors on base whenever I could.  

4 Feb: Official training plan started.  I was on a little training high! I looked forward to checking each workout off and felt really accomplished afterward.  There were 9 (3 of each swim, bike and run) workouts per 6 days (1 rest day).  I would usually swim and bike on the same day since I was going to the gym anyway.  And then the run day was somewhat of a "rest" (stress-free) day for me since I'm obsessed with it;  it's not only a workout for me but a stress-reliever.  Sunday was the day of rest... but I eventually changed rest day to Saturday since that is the only day of the week Dave had free. 

18ish Mar: Burnout after about 6 weeks.  I don't recall doing much for about 3 weeks.  And I didn't even care.  It was a weird feeling, because I DIDN'T EVEN CARE. Never happened before.  Granted the training for the first couple marathons I did was shotty, but for the last couple, I would have been FREAKING about my lack of caring.  Because I know how necessary the training is from experience/the pain of not training and, well, my education.  And common sense.  It wasn't until I was in Seattle visiting some friends that I realized what happened.  I was possibly slightly buzzed ranting to my friend Mike about how I didn't understand what had happend and he casually suggested "It sounds like you just burned yourself out."  Huh.  Burnout.  I had heard of this thing....but it was foreign to me until now.  It's true....I did train really, really hard for 6 weeks and didn't focus on much else.  That in itself I found out didn't work for me.  When training is the only thing you have going on, or your only "obligation," it's not that great.  Things were out of balance.     

20 Apr: I started getting back into things.  Missed a few weeks, NBD (eeeek).  I decided there was nowhere to go but up and I HAD to go up or this triathlon wasn't happening.  I also decided to add some weights into the mix and hang out with the meatheads.  I really think if I had my own weight room at home I could get into it big time.  But I hate the weightlifting environment.  And I hate how most lifters see little value in aerobic fitness or endurance.  I know I'm generalizing, but it's pretty accurate.  A lifting buddy definitely helps too.  I made zero effort in finding one of those.  I have to admit, this routine only lasted about 2 weeks (not proud. NOT PROUD).  But at least I was getting back on track with the 3 main disciplines. 

6 May: Pinched nerve

Or was I?? I was swimming my laps and all of the sudden BAM.  I felt a sharp pain in my right upper back/shoulder (the exact location is kind of fuzzy now) as I stroked with my right arm and started to pull through.  I couldn't keep swimming because the pain hardly allowed me to.  I stopped at the wall and started rubbing it.  But I could feel it; this was serious.  I got out after only about 400 meters.  I continued rubbing it throughout the day, used Icy Hot, used ice and heat.  But I could barely sleep because whenever I rolled over/moved my head I felt excruciating pain.  I scheduled what I call an emergency massage (because I still hadn't started the responsible routine of getting one regularly when I'm beating up my body 6 days a week.  I did have one on March 25th but hey-yo, I skipped April).  I already had one scheduled for 2 weeks later and I kept that appointment as well.  I vowed: from now on- Posture, water, stretching. 

3 Jun: Sick! Seriously.  While we were trying to eat fairly healthy while in WA (both in training that demanded a lot), perhaps I was enjoying too much fantastic wine and beer and going out too often :)  After Dave's graduation weekend, we were dragging a bit on Sunday packing up the whole house.  Our departure all of the sudden came so soon and we were trying to see friends/say goodbyes, use gift certificates, pack up and I, of course, was scrambling to acquire some local wines and brews to take back to share.  By the time we got to Missoula on Monday night, we were beat.  We had vouchers for a free drink at the bar and as I sat back and relaxed, I noticed my throat was sore.....dun dun DUN. No bueno.  Sore throat, ears and complete exhaustion took over my body over the course of the drive back home.  We managed to enjoy Yellowstone a bit, during which time I started a nightly dose of NyQuil.  Throughout the rest of the week and weekend,  I decided to inquire with Rev3 about switching to the Olympic Distance (instead of the Long Course or "Half IM").  They wrote me back giving me the option and until Monday morning to let them know.  

9 Jun: Swallowed my pride and decided to race the Olympic distance.  The training I did put in + some of setbacks was a better recipe for a strong Olympic race than a miserable Half.   

18 Jun: Depart for Virginia! That night, in a quiet little Sleep Inn just past St. Louis, my ear pain returned with a vengeance.  Excruciating.  Swallowing woke me up and I was in tears within a few minutes.  I found urgent care the next morning and figured out that, like I was hoping for the last couple weeks, I didn't need antibiotics.  But there was fluid in my ear wreaking HAVOC.  Wow I all of the sudden felt so badly for babies & kids with ear infections.  Because if that wasn't an ear infection, holy crap I don't ever want to feel one in my adult life.  I'm sure I had one as a baby?  I got all of kinds of stuff from the Doc to relieve the pain and keep things moving through all the canals and was feeling 100 x better throughout the day.  T-4 days until the race, haha.  And the rest is history. 

Derby Rock N' Route Tri

Unfortunately, I do not have a race report.  Just a race DAY report.  It went like this:

3 Aug:

2100: We begin tracking the weather and continue to check obsessively on both phones, hoping to see something other than 90% chance of thunderstorms all morning.  Maybe we should have just not looked...

2230-0510: Pretty rough sleep. Some lightening, some thunder.  Some anxiety about race morning.

4 Aug:

0515: After my alarm goes off, the adrenaline starts pumping through my slightly tired body.  I get up, go to the bathroom, get dressed, wash face, brush teeth, get dogs up, make some toast with peanut butter....watch the rain come down.  Watch storms on the radar, but still feel pretty excited. 

0615ish:  Leave the house for the triathlon...staying "hopeful."  Pull into park near the transition area and see no one is near the pool, but there are plenty of people setting up in transition and running around in the rain.  We park, and I realize I forgot my rain coat that I set out the night before with my tri suit.  How does this happen? I have no idea.  But I'm mad, haha.  We unload our bikes and JUST as we do this it starts pouring harder.  We throw our bikes on the rack and observe the mess of soaked gear under everyone's bikes.  Although some very wise and probably experiened racers have plastic bins with lids.....noted.  While we're out there, they make the announcement that transition will stay open until 710 and the start has moved to (tentatively) 0730 (back from 0640 and 0700, respectively).  We head to the truck with our bags.  Well, I'm soaked.  So with the extra time, we drive 3 minutes back home to get a dry shirt and my raincoat.  

0640: We get back and park in one of the last spots in that parking lot (otherwise it's up the block and across the street in a different parking lot).  We start thinking about how this isn't going to be too much fun.  Not only was it raining this morning, but it's been raining for days and there are flood warnings.  All I could think about was the roads and the bike...1) Even if it wasn't storming when the tri started, what if you're in the middle of the bike and it starts? Ride faster? To get away from the lightening? I felt this was a bad idea because 2) There were probably lakes all over the roads.

0650ish: They make another announcement that they will provide an update in 5-10 minutes.  We hang out in the truck until about 0700 and walk over to transition with our bags.  By now, the adrenaline has worn off and I'm just feeling tired.  Dave is not feeling in the mood to do it.  We run into a friend of his from the base (who is already bodymarked and chipped...bringing up the same thought in my head for the 15th time....are we quitters???) and talk about the conditions.  

0710: We grab our bikes and head back to the truck.  I was still wanting to hear that update so we walked back to hang out in the rain and listen to the decision.  We wonder....what radar were they looking at...?  Then Dave's friend mentions they are looking at re-doing the bike route? Must have been concerned about water on the road.  We see some others head out with their bikes, but not many overall.  At this point, something hits me as I watch people dash around in the pouring rain like "hardcore" pros...with a walk that screams 'I'm doing this even if they cancel it.'  I've run 5 marathons, I've done a couple tris....my ultimate goal is an Ultra distance tri....but I must not have the super crazy gene.  Or my crazy gene has some sort of mutation that makes me not want to do a tri in the pouring rain/FORECASTED LIGHTENING.  Would I be reacting differently or feeling more daring if I had invested more than 3 minutes travel time and more money?  Yeah, it was a time of observation and reflection :)

Waiting, waiting, waiting

0737:  About 40 minutes after they say there will be another update, they announce that they hope for an 0815 start.  We decide to leave.....disappointed that it wasn't rescheduled (honestly I was just kind of hoping for a couple big lightening strikes....) and that this was our last chance to do this little smalltown tri.  I was mostly excited for Dave to complete his first one.  

We don't regret our decision...maybe with more experience on the road it wouldn't have seemed as bad.  Maybe we should have trusted the city of Derby to watch the weather for us, and maybe we just need new weather apps (but Dave has a lot of very good weather resources that are reliable a lot of the time).  It never did storm badly, but as I was fixing a nice breakfast at home it started POURING more at about 8:40.  I would have just been starting my bike.  All of our landscaping was basically flooded and our street looked like Zachary River.   

Also, when we got home, I almost fell getting out of the truck.  Then I proceeded to stub my toe badly getting out of the shower.  Then I tripped in the kitchen making breakfast.  And then when I sat down to write, I spilled coffee on my desk.  

That sealed it....I was too uncoordinated this morning to complete a triathlon and probably would have crashed my bike in the road lake :) Ok maybe not, but wow what a rollercoaster of decision-making.  

So now we're having a nice family day on this rainy Sunday.  Drinking coffee with the dogs under our feet and making England plans.....life is good.  And I really do hope those folks had a fun race! (I assume the race happened)

Monday's update:  The race was cancelled and it's not being rescheduled.  Oh, weather. 

My relationship with running

So I've been totally off my blogging game. I'm not proud of this. I hate when I let whatever it is in life get between me and my little journal. I just looked....I have 5 drafts started. Seriously? I'm sure those will come to fruition.

But tonight as I was running I got the urge to spill my feelings about this sport I love so much. I've had a lot of obstacles training for this triathlon coming up next weekend. In fact, I made the very tough decision to switch from the Half (half ironman) distance to the Olympic on Monday. I'm stubborn and love a challenge....I signed up for a Half never having done an Olympic knowing it was a little ambitious but having confidence. After a burnout phase (never got that with running so I didn't even know what was happening really until after),  a pinched nerve that took me out for a while and then getting sick last week, I decided to swallow my pride. I'll still do a Half. But this isn't the right time.

But the tone of this post has been more negative than I intended when I started writing. Gah! My POINT is that I'm in love with running. I've enjoyed the swimming and biking, but I could really benefit from some training buddies and more coaching in these areas. Maybe I thought because I love to run alone I could just do it all alone.

I'll always have that relationship with the runner in me. It's a long-term relationship. I know it's developed through 15 years of running. I've learned a lot...how to challenge myself and push myself.  Through heat. Through wind. Through ankle sprains. Through Afghanistan dirt, dust and a burn pit (seriously thankful I didn't mess up my lungs). We're still working on the hills. We've come a long way with speed work. Through 5Ks. 10ks. Half Marathons. Marathons. So when I get injured or sick and miss a couple weeks and I'm freaking out about an upcoming triathlon during which I'm afraid I'll fall off my bike, the runner says...

"You've been away for a while, but we can totally pick up where we left off because we're besties! You've still got this. You can still push the speed. You can still push the endurance. You're mentally tough. Your legs are full of muscle even though your core sucks (seriously, work on your core please). You can still put one foot in front of the other, just a little faster. Even up this hill. Even against the annoying Kansas wind (when are you moving again?). Even facing the sun. Even though it never rained today and it's still humid as hell (WHEN ARE YOU MOVING?). We will rock the end of that silly triathlon. Smoke 'em! Hey aren't you super excited about those new running shoes coming in the mail next week?"

Seriously. The runner talks to me. That's what she said tonight. It's like she has so much confidence in me that I feel ok about maybe dying through the rest.

I don't take the fact that I can run for granted. I love it so much.

Geez it's even easy to blog about running.

Tri or do not; there is no Try

Well I didn't do the 3 hours of swimming and running workouts I was supposed to do today.  But it's all good because I went on a cleaning rampage and cleaned the house..folded the laundry, did the dishes, vaccumed and mopped the floors.  Wtf am I doing?? Somehow I do not think that is a suitable replacement.  Yeah, it's not.

This past week, I hit an entirely new low for training motivation.  Odd, because normally I am just training for runs...marathons....and doing a whole lot of running.  Now I'm swimming, biking and running each 3 times/week.  More variety, but the workouts don't change a whole lot from week to week.  I understand the monotony of the workouts....they pretty much stay the same but increase in duration/intensity/etc. each week....basic training progression principles.  I felt like I was doing awesome for the first 6 or so weeks. Then BAM.  I just got super bored.  I took a random rest day on Wednesday (normally on Saturdays).  And then today....well, I cleaned the house.

And did self-massage with the Aveda blue oil.  Ever since yesterday, I've had this nagging dull pain on the back left side of my head.  It felt like stress.....but in my head, not my upper back, shoulder and neck (like usual).  Dave gave me a nice massage last night, but today the pain had just moved to where it normally is (neck).  So annoying.  I actually need a massage.  I miss you Jaime!

I've always found motivation from within to get it done.  And it's never been that difficult, to be honest. Because I seriously really enjoy working out. But the enjoyment factor is what seemed to have changed, so I was kind of at a loss when it happened.  Someone telling me to just "go do it" was not going to help. Actually, that doesn't work for most people (reference coaching principles).  So naturally, I turned to the internet....google...triathlon training forums.  I found some good feedback, info and advice for getting through something like this.  Turns out, I'm not the first one who this has happened to.....crazy.

One post recommended affirmations.  And an inspiration wall.  I'm starting there.  That's right, I'm going to print out a bunch of pictures of me being awesome, and inspirational quotes...and hang a poster on my wall. Also, taking a break from structured training.  One could argue my non-scheduled rest days count for this....but from now on, if I feel unmotivated to complete the workout of the day, I will still do something that doesn't seem as boring.  Until I can get back to where I was, enjoying each swim, bike and run.

What really felt good was accepting this as a new challange in a training program.  Not a reason to get discouraged.  To be quite honest, this was the one thing I felt I had control of in this phase of my life and I refuse to let this get the best of me.  It felt good to accept that I can just pick back up tomorrow and (although it might hurt a tiny bit since I've been a SLACKER) it's ok and I'll get back on track.  I have been spending time with wonderful friends recently, and cleaning up the house and making dinner for my husband today felt like a little needed balance/organization to everything.

It feels good to keep the control.  As best as I can, anyway.  I'm looking forward to this week and pushing myself through this rut.  I know there are some other factors playing into this struggle, like some depression. But that is probably for another post. Because that is a whole separate topic that I'd rather blog about than discuss.  Why?  Well, stay tuned.  To my blog.

So my point here is......just keep on keeping on :)