Spent a week in 'bama

What can I say, there are other places I would have rather been "vacationing" with my husband.  Pure Michigan maybe? But, the AF decided Dave was going to spend his summer in the South, and I just wanted to be wherever he was.

All I was really focusing on before the trip was seeing Dave & friends, so I wasn't expecting the whirlwind of emotions that came with being around so many friends (all still in the AF), all of his classmates (obviously all in the AF), and.....I'm not sure if I talked to one person who wasn't in the AF for those 9 days.  I can confess to my blog here that I felt really lonely and isolated.  SOS this, SOS that.  Meanwhile, I did not get any studying done for my certification like I planned.  My fault.  I just wanted to spend as much time with all of our friends as possible, yet it was a constant reminder that led me to the realization that I miss the AF, in general.  It's upsetting that my experience led me to the decision that it did (to leave), but the fact is that it did.  One of my worst fears felt like it was coming true- regret. But I left for good reasons, and those reasons still hold true.  So, forget regret.

We spent our time working out (did arms in the weightroom but haven't done them since I've been back home....waste!), maybe drinking a little bit of wine, and hanging out with friends. The trip started with the coincidence of me being on the same flight as our friend Lindsay going to visit our friend (her husband:) Adam for the weekend.  He is an instructor at the base where Dave is doing his training/school.  I used to work with him here at McConnell.  Confused? Sometimes it's all confusing even to me.

Friday:  Adam and Dave picked us up from ATL and we all got to catch up! The Pahls are fun. 

Saturday: Dave and I went out to dinner at Bonefish with my old college roomie Shannon and our friend (her husband....seriously everyone is friends and everyone is married) Kayu and their adorable little princess Charlotte.  It was great catching up and we had the best waiter.....

Sunday: We got to see Kelly and James. Win!  No Andy :-/  Off playing Army.

Monday:  I worked out while Dave was at class.  Should have consulted Kelly on how to actually row the right way.  I got a little bit of a workout but don't think it was quite right.  Remembered that I tried rowing for a week my freshmen year of college and decided it would be too much with ROTC.  TOTALLY regret that decision.  But I digress.  Anyway I think that workout is about all I accomplished.  Then we got some Reeeeed Robin.  YUM.

Red Robin...

YUM

Tuesday:  Went for a run before Dave had to be at class.  I made a last-minute hair appointment to get my hair colored because it was turning weird colors.  I managed to find an Aveda salon even though the first thing that came up when I googled "hair salons montgomery al" was "Montgomery Black hair salons."  Ate some lunch and then did a Commissary run to get stuff to make dinner at Kelly's.  It was fun using someone else's kitchen, not sure why :)  We ate dinner and had another nice visit.

Love

Wednesday, Happy 4th!:  Got up early and left for FL to spend the 4th with Shannon, Kayu, Charlotte, Tomo, Abby and Cooper.  Didn't make good time but had a little time at the Eglin AFB beach when we got there.  Then it was a rainy afternoon that led to a dance party to the college party mixed CDs.  Turns out some of the "missing" CDs in the collection are with Abby :) Tomo made an excellent dinner....cilantro rice, beans, shrimp, fish....yum.  Then we went to the fireworks.

Mango salsa & guac...heaven.

 

 

 

Thursday:  Went to Destin for lunch to meet up with one of Shannon's hs friends.  Was like a classier version of Panama City :) Pretty views from Harry T's.  Drove back to Montgomery.

Smothering the kids.

View from Harry T's

Checking out the big Pirate ship-looking boat!

Photo booth....saved $5 by taking my own picture

Friday:  Got to babysit Coop-man while Abby went running with her flight and played FLEX (this little AF game is similar to dodgeball but with "special" tactics and strategy).  Watched Dave play, then Kayu and Abby.  Cooper got smashed with a ball but survived.  We worked out and went to Kelly's for dinner.  Kabobs and really yummy corn.  Then we watched......you guessed it- Dateline! Enjoyed some vanilla ice cream with strawberries and blueberries (I KNOW Dave was wondering why I don't provide simple, semi-healthy desserts like that instead of crazy chocolate cakes and such) and wine and murder stories.  Perfect.

Dave...FLEXing

Saturday:  Dave and Breanne day.  Slept in, worked out (we tried a kickboxing video at the gym....yikes am I uncoordinated), went to the local flea market with Kelly and James.  Got recommendation to try Chris' Hot Dogs, local place that's been around 95 years.  They had just gotten Oskar Blues Beer in and this guy was giving me the history.  Read here:

http://blog.al.com/wire/2012/07/alabama_brothers_award-winning.html

It was super good!  Then we took Kelly's recommendation and ate at The Olive Room, a local place downtown offereing fine cuisine for a special night out.  Got Grouper with an amazing side dish and I don't even know what it was....why do I do that?? Why don't I ask? I want it again! Tasted like grits or potatoes....oh I don't know.  Mouth is watering thinking about it though.

Sneaking pictures of James in the car.  Sweet.

Dale's Pale Ale

100x better in a glass!

Chris' Hot Dog WAS really yummy

Date night- The Olive Room

Maxwell AFB

Alabama

Sunday:  Ate at the Egg and I (oh yeah we did that Saturday too) and then crashed Kelly and James' day again :)  Then it was time to pack up and hit Hotlanta.

Saw lots of cute kids and good friends...

Ate lots of good food...

Saw some shnazzy fireworks...

Stayed active enough to not COMPLETELY screw up the marathon training...

Spent 9 days with my husband.

All in all, a win.  Unlike the day that followed.....TBC.

dear diary

the only thing I know to do is write at this point.

well, and read.  I can't believe how long I've been "reading" this book.

I'm sure there are people in my life (if no one else but Dave) who have noticed this book floating around my world for like a year now.  It's really pathetic, but I'm finally getting to the point where I can focus my mind on leisurely reading and I've put a dent in this one.  Part of me thinks I'm subconsciously dragging it out for a reason.  I love it and every time I pick it back up, it feels like the part I'm reading is just for me.  Like Elizabeth is saying "hey, you have a problem?  well I've had the same exact one." And really, I don't want it to be over. 

“You need to learn how to select your thoughts just the same way you select your clothes every day. This is a power you can cultivate. If you want to control things in your life so bad, work on the mind. That's the only thing you should be trying to control.” -Richard to Elizabeth (Eat Pray Love)

“There is so much about my fate that I cannot control, but other things do fall under the jurisdiction. I can decide how I spend my time, whom I interact with, whom I share my body and life and money and energy with. I can select what I can read and eat and study. I can choose how I'm going to regard unfortunate circumstances in my life-whether I will see them as curses or opportunities. I can choose my words and the tone of voice in which I speak to others. And most of all, I can choose my thoughts.” - Elizabeth

Just read that on Sunday.  Amen.

This is the first time I've ever read a book and thought "I want to be there.  with them."  And then I thought who is the Richard in my life?

My Dad always told me that it isn't what happens to you, but what you are telling yourself about what happens to you that matters.  Honestly, I was always nodding in agreement while thinking "whatever, this sucks."  Well I am not sure if it is my age, or people here and there from every part of my life rubbing off on me a little more, or this book (this book is amazing)...but I'm finally starting to get it, Dad. 

Well, shit happens. 

Sometimes people walk away.  “When someone leaves, it's because someone else is about to arrive.” Paulo Coelho.  via Mojdeh.  and she did.

Reaction:

I can't change what I've done in the past.  I don't read minds.  I can't control others.  That is obvious.  And I'm confident in declaring that I didn't do anything to deserve this.  But, that's life.  And some people just simply don't want you in theirs. 

I'm very aware of and in touch with my shortcomings.  Insecurities.  It's all too obvious to me.  But I'm finally ok with them.  I don't feel bad.   

I can choose my words and how I treat people.  I'm honestly now a little nervous about people not being honest with me...me not realizing it....not being prepared.  Maybe because I usually think I'm pretty in touch, and this knocked me off my feet.  But that's ok.  I can't control that.  Time to show others what some selfless people have shown me, unconditionally.  

At least now I can choose to never make anyone feel the way this made me feel.

Lucky & Lonely MWF

I've got a gift certificate to paradise.  Just sayin.'  I love that Meghan bribed us to come back out with this lovely gift :)  The letters N.E.P.E.N.T.H.E. put a smile on my face.  I wish we were rich so we could escape to Big Sur on a whim...

I also recently used $45 of the $70 of paradise (massage from Jamie) that Dave got me for my birthday.  I'm a lucky girl.

I shouldn't have to, but I have to remind myself of this often.  I've been in sort of a rut lately.  It does and doesn't have to do with Dave leaving for 6 weeks.  A lot of the best friends we made out here have moved.  The local support system up and left! It's just what happens with the military, yes....but it stings a little!  Yes I'm a little picky in choosing friends, but I feel this is necessary based on my past experiences.  Feeling a little isolated here in Kansas, sometimes.   Not sure how else to describe it.  I know I have friends and family (afar) who love me.  But I think sometimes they seriously forget about us out here, that is all.  For a few years, I didn't get lonely.  I guess I was still on the high of getting to move around and "see the world" or whatever.  Well, I do like moving around.  But it doesn't always feel peachy, that is all.

BUT.  The lucky part.  I DO have Dave.  The best husband in the world.  I have bribes coming in from CA (have to go spend the certificate, right?) and invitations to run marathons with all my running buddies spread throughout the country.  As far as people not visiting here...well I often wonder if it is because we don't constantly invite people to come out, or they just take us coming home to MI or going other places for granted and don't even think how expensive it can get, and how difficult it is for us both to be able to leave at the same time and actually plan trips with Dave's AF surprise trips....or they just can't imagine visiting Kansas (well get over it, it's where we live).  Meghan wanted to visit on her way out West once, and I basically said no :/ I felt too overwhelmed at the time.  How crappy is that?? Oh, how my appreciation for true friendship has changed. 

Excerpt from Rachel Bertsche's MWF Seeking BFF (the book), talking about British anthropologist Robin Dunbar's theories on how the size of the human brain determines how many relationships we can maintain:

"Social network means something different today than it did back in the nineties.  Dunbar didn't care about the number of people who follow you on Twitter.  He was talking about relationships "that depend on extensive personal knowledge based on face-to-face interaction for their stability."  Reading someone's status update doesn't count."

And THAT is why facebook sucks.  And why I just started wondering why I even used it.  Well, over the past week, sometimes I did almost try to pull up Facebook to post something.  Then remembered, haha.  But then I think, who do I REALLY want to share this with?  Sometimes it's just not ideal to make a call in the middle of the day or expect text dialogue with those people when they are working or busy with other things.  That was the beauty of FB...you could just throw things on there.....for no one to pay attention.  And sort of wonder if the people who did like or commented on posts REALLY cared??  Ok I'm regurgitating Saturday's post.  So instead I post things on this blog...that no one reads :).  But, aside from anyone who runs across it or remembers that it exists or feels like checking it, this is really for me. Ok, maybe I wish people would read it.  But...I get something out of it regardless.

Point- those "real" relationships are important, and I have some really good ones at a distance.  FB was just making it easier to not work harder at them.  I have some good ones locally too...just have to remind myself to reach out to people (ya know, real interaction) when I start feeling like I'm millions of miles away from comfort.

Mudding, and so much more

Well, if I don't do this now...the memories will start to fade.  And I definitely don't want to forget the hell we put ourselves through...for $270.

For the record, this was all Kelly and Andy's idea....so the credit for the good, the bad and the ugly goes to them :)

We committed to and signed up for the Tough Mudder in early November....leaving us "plenty" of time to train and get in shape.  Then it was Thanksgiving, then it was Christmas and then it was Ellie.  Can't blame the weather, because we've had a beautiful winter.  Dave has the extra excuse of long hours at work.  Ok, never mind.  There's no excuse! We just didn't train very well.  Regardless, as we neared the date, we were just excited to go spend the weekend with some of our best friends.

Dave and I flew out of Wichita late Friday morning and arrived in Atlanta in the afternoon.  Can I just say I love traveling with my husband?  Always an adventure.  We have been to Atlanta quite a bit, and decided to just start driving east towards Washington, GA, the location of the infamous Tough Mudder Georgia.  As Dave drove, I used my iHand (Brandon named it that a while back.  he's right) to look up lunch spots/breweries in Athens.  Terrapin Brewery wasn't open until later in the day, but we found a little place called Trappeze Pub with a great draught beer menu.  The atmosphere reminded us of ABC in Ann Arbor.  And we had our own little booth with a door.  It was cool! Hey I appreciate the small, unique things.

After eating too much, we continued our drive toward Washington.  Good thing we already had the directions to the hotel in our phone because there was "less and less 3G" as we got closer :) We actually missed the turn onto this small little road that, when we turned around and got onto it, would lead us to the little plaza where our hotel was located.  It felt so cozy when we pulled in.  Washington, GA is a very small historic southern town (check it out here).  Our hotel, The Fitzpatrick Hotel, was originally opened in 1898 and renovated in 2002 after being closed for 50 years.  It opened again in 2004.  Dave and I LOVE places like this.  I have no idea how to describe this type of architecture besides saying "wood everywhere and wood floors" (Dave could), so I will just explain it the best way I know how...pictures.

The owners (at least the only two we met and talked with during our visit) are a husband and wife with 4 children (1 recently adopted from India).  She is Indian, with a Southern accent.  Unique! Anyway, they were just the nicest people and we talked with them for a while before settling into our room, which we of course got into with "regular" keys as opposed to plastic card ones.  So weird....it felt like home.  Then we grabbed another bite to eat about 25 feet away on the other side of the plaza at The Washington Jockey Club restaurant.  Greeted by so much southern hospitality and conversation (which I'm normally not even really interested in, to be honest.  But it's different when it's so genuine).  True Southern Hospitality (never experienced this in Warner Robins...).  It was such a nice change. 

Ran into this too, nice.  Noted.

We got back to our room well before 11 (if you planned on getting back later you had to make special arrangements with the owners to get in the front door! looking back, this would not have been a problem because they are the friendliest people in the world and would do anything).  We got to bed by 11 and set the alarm for 7.  We were supposed to be at the site 2 hours before our start time, which would be 0840.  Once we figured out that night that it was going to be colder than expected, we weren't really interested in standing around too long before.  Kelly and Andy met us at about 0820, at which point we were still just distracted by the fact that we got to see our great friends.  Then, denial was over.  We were actually doing this Tough Mudder thing.  We piled into our brand new rental (turned out to be an interesting choice later....NBD, nothing Resolve can't fix) and drove about 15 minutes down the road to the site.  As we got close to the driveway for the motocross park, we saw a huge lake and all gasped.  Like we didn't think we were going to get wet and muddy?? Oh we (at least I) had no idea though.  I'm really glad I didn't know what we were getting into.

Since I didn't bring my brain with me, or it was already half frozen, who knows, I forgot some stuff I needed in the car after we started walking toward the check-in point.  So we did a little loop back to the car (chance to escape, should have taken it).

We checked in, threw some Tough Mudder paint on our faces, went to the bathroom, got a pic

decided it was freezing and checked our bags so we could start.  Starting is the hardest part, right?? Right.  Let's go with that!  Thought about getting my free beer beforehand as a way to warm up a little, but I felt I should earn it.

We turned the corner to the starting wall....yeah they made us jump a wall before we even got the starting speech/pep talk thing.  Soooo, we did that.  They had us all take a knee, and went through safety points and motivational speeches.  He talked about how the event supports the Wounded Warrior Project and wounded warriors who had completed Tough Mudders....and about real heroes.  I was glad to be a part of an event that recognized the real heroes.  And it kicked off with the National Anthem, like any sporting event should.  I'll be honest, the "starting ceremonies" did a decent job of getting me pumped up.

Can't believe I've rambled this far and haven't gotten to the meat of the story.  But I actually don't think I want to do a play-by-play of the obstacles (can't really even remember the order) because the anticipation is half the fun if you plan on doing one.  Let me sort of summarize:  Run (for 12 miles), jump, fall in mud/deep water, slide through mud, get shocked a little, jump in "Arctic Enema" (glad I didn't really know the definition of that word before I jumped in.....) which was just flat out scary, trudge through thick mud waist deep, whine a little (yeah, broke that rule), repeat water & mud....25 obstacles total, have I given away too much?? The thing is, it's all on their website.  But I DIDN'T BOTHER PAYING ATTENTION BEFORE WE DID IT.  Haha.  I truly believe this was a blessing :)  The one last thing I will point out is that they DID write our bib numbers on our foreheads and arms in permanent marker in order to be able to "identify" our bodies, if necessary.  Thought it was sort of a joke, but I don't think so as your BIB easily rips off and there are some serious injuries...

I guess what I found to be the coolest as we all got more cold/freezing/hypothermic as the wind picked up and the temperatures dropped was that I really could not have done it without Dave, Kelly, Andy and their friend Phil, along with the other random dudes who hurled me over hay bales, pulled my shoe out of the mud (seriously could not get it out) and pulled me up muddy hills.  The guys helped me physically and Kelly helped me mentally as she took the "let's get this over with" mentality.  Normally that is the way I am with runs, but this was testing me for sure.  There were a couple points when I wasn't sure if I could make it....primarily due to temperature, but no one let that last long.  We did skip a couple things at the end, like jumping 30 feet or so into the lake.....this would have been awesome in warmer weather but I literally did not think my body could handle the cold shock again.  I felt slightly bad that we had to skip a few like this, but not really.  I think we pushed as much as we could.  The winds were so strong at the end...so cold.  Were we in Kansas?? It was annoying.

We all took the last challenge of Electroshock Therapy and got our orange finisher bands. Grabbed as many free protein bars as I could, only to find out that I couldn't bend my fingers to hold on to them, yet I managed to grab my free cold beer and endure the pain of holding THAT.  Ha.  I wanted more muddy pictures of us, but for once, I was not really giving a CRAP about pictures.  Because I don't think I had ever been so cold in my life.  We got our bags, got a quick pic (in which we all look way too clean), and went back to the car.  We managed to get our shoes off and leave those in the field (donation?).

Kelly and Andy came back to our room with us and we showered 2 at a time.  I think we no kidding considered going all at once (ok it went through my head.....in survival mode, no kidding).  And then, we all realized we would survive as feeling came back to the extremities, and core.  We all got dressed up in our finest sweatpants, and Andy even sported his new $2 CVS sandals he and Dave went to get because he forgot extra shoes.  We settled back into The Washington Jockey Club and got burgers, steaks, fries, and beers.  I read a sign at Bessie's today that said "Dogs are our only chance at picking our own relatives."  Disagreed! Andy and Kelly feel like our family. 

They went back to Winder, GA to stay with Andy's parents and we went back across the street to the hotel, but not before a stop at the restaurant there to have ice cream & a cupcake and coffee.  We talked with the hotel owners for about an hour after that (this was great except that my knees were in a tremendous amount of pain) before going back to our room for some R&R.  I didn't really want to leave this place.

The next morning, we got ready and drove to Winder to spend the afternoon with the Morrisons.  Finally got to meet James! Love him.  "If" we have kids, I can only hope he is half as cute and calm as sweet baby James.  It would have been a relaxing afternoon if Andy didn't make us watch The Walking Dead.  Kidding.  Definitely an interesting series.  His mom fed us delicious chili right after watching zombie guts, it was perfect! :)  

Our last stop with Andy, Kelly & James was Rocky Mountain Pizza Company in Atlanta.  Yum.

I always feel lucky after a perfect weekend with Dave, or great friends, or both.  We'll certainly never forget what we went through together.....it's kind of like a deployment.  But we decided we are Tough-er Mudders than if we had done it in warm weather.  Tough Mudder in semi-extreme conditions- check.

Tough Mudder 2013?  Summer event please.


http://toughmudder.com/