Home for the Holidays

It is hard to believe that Christmas is 2 days away, and that on Christmas Day, we will have been here in England for exactly 4 weeks.

Getting here the day before Thanksgiving and on the brink of the holiday season was strange. I won't say sad, because I was too overwhelmed with other emotions for sadness. Mostly, I was excited for the ride.

Before even arriving in the U.K., we had two invitations to Thanksgiving meals. New country,  two invitations for Thanksgiving. In a country that doesn't even celebrate Thanksgiving. Following the relief of arriving safely with the dogs and in the midst of exhaustion, we were using screenshots of maps on our phones (otherwise about as useful as bricks) to navigate our reliable rental Accord to the house of some friends of a friend for Thanksgiving. On the left side of the road, of course. We ended the evening visiting a fellow U of M alum and friend from ROTC. Oh, you're in England too? Fancy seeing you here!

The thing with the military is....there is a "little America" wherever you go. There is always someone you know. And as time goes on, you know more people everywhere.

The first year I was away from home in Michigan, I had Thanksgiving with Dave and my friend Kevin who drove from Michigan to see us Georgia. In 2008, I spent it with the Woodmans in Georgia. Dave was in pilot training. In 2009, I was deploying 3 days later and we spent it with the Bartomeos in Kansas.  In 2010, Dave was deployed and I spent it with the Krausses in Kansas. In 2011, Dave and I took a trip to California and spent the holiday with the Rubys in San Francisco. Last year, we spent it with our awesome neighbors Steve and Julie and their family. Friends have always surrounded us with love during the holidays.

We've been able to get home to Michigan and to Chicago to spend Christmas with family a few times, but revolving the longer family trips around holidays hasn't always worked with deployments and TDYs = what everyone experiences in the military.

But I've been thinking a lot lately about what 'home for the holidays' really means to me after living this lifestyle for several years. Because while I'm in a new (I won't say completely foreign) country, I feel oddly more at home than even I would have expected.

Home is spending holidays with friends in the same situation, across the ocean from loved ones. It's just like in the states, but everyone is even further away and less likely to be flying back home, and even more concerned about people not spending the holidays alone.

Home is being surrounded by people you just met who went through moving here during the holidays in years prior, and know what you're going through...staying in temporary lodging on base and living out of suitcases for 4-5 weeks. Not that it's "so terrible," but that it just isn't exactly comfortable. With 2 dogs. More people than I would have expected have gone through the exciting process of moving here with dogs! :) I shouldn't be surprised.

Home is in the BX when you make the sad mistake of finding yourself in the middle of some midnight madness shopping with hundreds of other Americans. Honestly this is something I would never dream of partaking in back in the States, but maybe I just enjoyed the familiarity of my surroundings for a couple hours.

Home is picking a tag from the Angel Tree on base and fulfilling a 7 year old boy's holiday wish. I'll be completely honest- I haven't participated in an Angel Tree since we did it at church growing up. I wish I could see that little boy open up his lego set (that Dave had a blast picking out) and Yahtzee game on Christmas morning, but imagining is enough.

Home is baking cookies for the Airmen in the dorms with an oven I have no idea how to operate. With a wine bottle as a rolling pin (this isn't my first rodeo). And circle biscuit cutters for cookie cutters because the Christmas cookie cutters were sold out two weeks ago. But because it is fun and those 18 and 19 year old Airmen are across the pond from their families too. I'll be honest, prior to this year, I never participated in the cookie drive on base...ever. The ladies collecting them were SO excited and appreciative when we dropped them off that I stopped stressing that maybe they were too done and I messed them up in the foreign oven I didn't know how to use. I really did make them with love and drenched them with sugary yummy frosting and sprinkles so if that isn't enough...I hope they aren't homesick for their mom's cookies back home :)

Giving during the holidays feels good. Giving anonymously or to those you don't know feels even better, I think. I don't know why. I took comfort in participating in these Christmas traditions, regretting not doing it more in the past.

Home is sending out Christmas cards even though they probably won't arrive until New Year's. Maybe Valentine's Day. I really enjoy doing that every year so it was comforting to be able to sit down and write them as usual. With Christmas music playing, of course.

Home is being with Dave and the pups. Anywhere, including this little TLF (military acronym translation-temporary lodging facility). Because while I would love to be with more of my family, they are enough.

And not only are they enough, but we are in the middle of an amazing opportunity. I so truly appreciate the Christmas cards we have received from friends and family back home, along with messages sending love. It would be sad if everyone forgot about us :) But I also truly feel so lucky for what we have and where we are.

On Saturday night, we attended Dave's Squadron Christmas Party at Clare College at The University of Cambridge. I looked it up later and Clare College was founded in 1326! It is the University's second oldest college. The U.S. is just a little baby compared to this place :) Large pictures of Cambridge scholars hung on the dining room walls as craziness ensused at the party. During his closing comments, Dave's Commander talked about one scholar in particular, General Cornwallis, one of the leading British Generals in the American Revolutionary War. In 1781 he surrendered to American and French forces at the Siege of Yorktown. Today, the British host American forces in their country as our Allies & friends, and allow us to hold our holiday parties in rooms where their leaders studied. It is...amazing!

We hope all of our loved ones have a wonderful holiday surrounded by friends, family & love!

Merry Christmas!

U.K. Week 1

I've really been wanting to blog but I have been...le tired. So I'll just do a thought dump. This might lack creativity. So far:

The cider is GREAT.
English food is good
and...
the roads are CRAZY.

I thought IPAs went down too easy. Now I have a whole new problem: cider.

Driving in the English countryside will be the scariest thing about this assignment. I had no idea.

I've been spending my evenings drinking tea and doing fun activities like studying for my U.K. drivers permit. I passed with the minimum score of 80% today. So more "Highway Code" review is in my near future. But really, the book isn't going to help when you are driving down tiny roads with no shoulders in the dark with deep ditches on either side full of 20 feet of water. The roads in the countryside surrounding the base were not designed for fast cars. They were designed for slow tractors and horses.  

Yesterday we put a holding deposit on a house in Ely. We fell in love with the house when we viewed it so we jumped on it; there have been less and less properties to let as we move into winter, and especially with all the things we were looking for so that was a huge relief. It is cozy, right off the river, across the street from a cute tearoom and antique store, has a decent yard for the pups, and is in walking distance of the train station, the grocery store, restaurants, pubs, the cathedral and several other charming little sites.

Now that we know where we will live, we will set up a local bank account. SIM cards should be in the mail now so I can be connected to the world again with my iHand.... :) But really, it will just be nice for Dave and I to have phones to get a hold of each other in a foreign country. We are still driving our "Reliable Rental" around town (and I guess until we passed our test today, sort of illegally? Ok let's be honest this scaredy cat has only driven once. Like 10 feet to the Commissary. And I think I forgot to drive on the left)...a heavy duty Honda Accord with 130, 000 miles on it. So we need to buy a car soon. We may try to just get by with one for now; as I mentioned, the house we found is in walking distance of basically everything I could need.

The process of signing a lease off base is sort of drawn out because the base must go inspect the house for safety...in our best interest, I guess. Hopefully that goes smoothly. Since we got here, we've been staying in temporary lodging on base. We had to switch rooms today (while simultaneously attending the mandatory Newcomers Brief...it's all about somehow doing 2 things at once right now), adding another level of confusion and stress for the dogs. I am guessing we'll be here for about 3 more weeks. I know what the relief will feel like for all of us when they have a yard again.

Dave and I are both sick. Should have totally expected that to happen. I was just starting to get back into my running a few days ago when it came on; maybe my body doesn't agree with the damp cold yet.

Everyone who has moved here has told us it will take AT LEAST 30 days to get settled. So for now, it's one day at a time. It's laying down at night exhausted but appreciative of this opportunity. It's moments of excitement mixed with moments of pure anxiety. Thankful we're here as a family & thankful for the warm welcome we have received from friends in the form of cooked meals, care packages with British goodies and truly making us feel like we can call for anything (with our pay as you go phone from 1990 that I barely know how to operate....but it works). Also, the locals. Very kind!

Cheers!

Our first meal (at London Heathrow). I was a fan.

Bag of snacks and beer from Dave's sponsor/squadron that was
in our room when we checked in. We lived off of that for a
couple days I think.

Bird in Hand, right outside the base. Dave had been
here many a time before when passing through Mildenhall.

British Beef & Ale Pie with a cold Strongbow

RAF Mildenhall Forest

Ely Cathedral.  Basically in the backyard of the
house we are trying to get.

Said delicious cider.

Welcome & goodies from the 351st

Honestly, the dogs are done with this phase.
Soon, dogs. SOON. Life will be back to normal.

Thank a Veteran

I am so thankful for all Veterans. I enjoy seeing all my friends change their facebook profile pictures to those in uniform, with family members and fellow service members. It brings a lot of memories flooding back, and reminds me of the sacrifices that so many have made and are still making today. Right now. It makes me reflect on why I chose to join the military, and the reasons I have made the decisions that got me where I am today. It makes me proud to know so many amazing people.

I, like many others, am grateful for our Veterans every day. But many of us get caught up with day-to-day life and what we're doing and I think many, like me, don't think about it deeply all the time. I don't like to admit that, but it is true. Maybe because it is too sad? After 12 years in the current war, this country as a whole has become desensitized to what is still a very dark reality, in my opinion.

And like with everything else, FB makes it very easy to share our feelings and acknowledge our appreciation of Veterans. This isn't a bad thing. But what else can I do to help Vets year-round? More than I'm doing now.

I Commissioned in the Air Force in 2007. In 2008, my Grandpa passed away. My other Grandpa passed away when I was in high school and just beginning to consider serving in the Air Force (thanks to my brother).

I'll be honest, I did not have a deep appreciation of military service growing up. My appreciation of military service really only developed after it was too late to thank both of my grandfathers for their service, during a time when it wasn't always a choice.  And not on FB, but in person. And I will say, I regret that. It's weighed on me for a few years.

Thinking about you both today and wishing I would have said thank you!  ♥

Blessed not stressed

Ok, sure. I feel like I've gained the American 15 (you know, the "oh crap we're moving to another country in a month and we're super busy moving out of the house and we have a lot to do and we're getting lazy with our meal planning and I want all the 'American' food I can get before I leave, anyway" equivalent to the Freshman 15) + I haven't been running enough to relieve stress, but let's face it, that is just me letting the stress win + sleep was not good for a couple weeks = I finally got sick a couple of days ago. Lots of tea and NyQuil and a lil' Bourbon (from Brandon and Julie) and I'm well on my way to feeling better already.  

But other than that, things could be going much worse. We sold our house & closed last week. Even made like $5 on it. We're living with good friends & having a great time. It's like having college roommates but we make fancier meals and drink much better alcohol :) It's FALL! And I swear there is more fall color than usual around here :) Brandon and Julie stole my car. Ok, no. They bought it. Thank you Brandon and Julie for buying my car! I hope you enjoy the ride. We also got to see them for a night when they picked it up. We went to eat at Red Rock Canyon, a local favorite of ours (and theirs when they lived here). We have a few more things to knock out but we would not have made it to this point so smoothly without the support of great neighbors and friends, near and far.  

(And thank you, Dave, for dealing with my stress when it does rear its ugly head.  You are the one who gets to see it up close and personal).

We're in this giant transitional phase and I'm really trying to choose gratitude over stress, anxiety or worry. Soak up the time with the people and the "things" we love & enjoy here, because as much as I long to get settled again, I know we will miss family, friends and 'Merica!

Estimated date of departure: 25 Nov!
Thanksgiving plans: Turkey (or Shephard's pie?) and beer in an English pub

(Click to enlarge tiny photos:)

Moving Picnic

The living room is empty. When I brought the dogs back from daycare, there was another level of confusion. They stared at the empty room. Then they laid on the edge of it most of the day. They were pretty tired, but after I did some more work around the house, I took them with me on my run just to make sure. Really trying to keep them tired and keep them in familiar environments to minimize their stress levels. I myself am obviously not confused, and haven't really been hit by the sadness. In denial maybe? But the longer I was in the house walking from room to room, preparing for the next phase of packers/movers (long term storage), it became more weird. Dave left this afternoon to go fly and expected to get home at about 9. So I decided to turn the living room into something less empty.  A picnic!

A blanket, red Solo cups, Big Bold Red Yellowtail (not only do we like that one, but we let the packers pack all of our wine bottle openers yesterday...obviously we are still moving rookies. the Big Bold Red is a screw top:)), and popcorn.  Ok I planned (microwave) popcorn, but Dave brought a light Arby's meal home.  Even better. Family picnic by candlelight complete. I think we might move the spare mattress upstairs tonight :)

How do you cope with big moves? How do you turn the weirdness into fun? ♥

Marriage Spices

A little over 4 years ago, Dave and I bought our first house.  Today, our stuff is being packed up to move to England. My emotions are running wild. 

And my olfactory receptors have been stimulated. Wait, what? While going through our kitchen, the packers mentioned that they actually can ship spices. Really? While I hate throwing away condiments and spices, I had already felt at ease knowing we were going to give them to some friends this time. And there is just something about spices being in storage for 5-6 weeks that makes me ok with getting fresh ones when we arrive. 

So I was doing a little inventory and found these in a box of Penzeys Spices my aunt gave me for my wedding shower.  We used up a lot of the spices but these were tucked away at the bottom and I forgot about them. I think these did the marriage good. I LOVE that guy a lot. Great 4 years.  

So the spices are staying here. But these little spice marriage charms might go with us. Hey, in the grand scheme of things we are still a newly married people, and I think we could both use the Rosemary for our memory improvement, anyway. 

Things my husband says: "I harass you so much not only because you are my wife, but because you're my best friend." (today).  Oh, thanks. See, marriage going strong :) 

Saturday- Ignoring the need for move prep. One more bonfire:

Day 1- Move Prep:

Day 2- Actual Boxes; some shown below. 68 total. We may have to build a fort out of the boxes and live there because I don't think we'll be living in a place big enough for our 68 boxes of stuff + furniture:

Dave, myself & the dogs did not get packed into the boxes, so we're good.  We're still a family unit. A few people reminded me of that today ♥  So if we can avoid getting packed into the storage boxes on Thursday, we're clear sailing. 

Mattress Moving Moments

We have 3 Queen mattresses. The oldest is Dave's $500 clearance mattress from college. It ranks 2nd in comfort. It's not bad at all. The next is a "luxurious" pillowtop Spring Air mattress we bought from Rooms to Go when I lived in Georgia. Spring Air went bankrupt or something. That makes sense because it completely sucked after about 1.5 years and it killed my back (somewhere between the time I bought it and then, they went out of business. Warranty no good). It definitely ranks 3rd in comfort.  Let me put it this way....I was not looking forward to coming home to my bed after my deployment because my little twin deployment bed was more comfortable. When I got home, we went big. We went for the Tempurpedic. It is still glorious to this day.

Well Hotel Clark is also going out of business when we move to England. We won't have that much space. I am happy to say that both downstairs queens were utilized at the same time on two different occassions while we lived here, so it was worth it to have both of them :) And for a few nights, I guess the Spring Air wasn't too bad, so our guests said.

Needless to say, Spring Air is getting the boot. Today I scheduled to have it picked up as a bulk item in tomorrow's trash pick-up. But I thought why not put it out on the curb this evening and tomorrow morning and see if anyone takes it?

So began the adventure of Dave & I trying to get the massive pillowtop out of the bedroom, up the stairs and out the door. So. Awkward. I don't know how movers do it. I am guessing they are much, much stronger than me, and thus aren't laughing their asses off as they repeatedly drop heavy pieces of furniture. This crappy mattress doesn't even have handles.  Ellie was going nuts running up and down the stairs. She gets excited when she doesn't know what is going on. Teddy is watching patiently on the landing.  Probably nervous. I'm cracking up. And Dave is shaking his head. I wish someone was taping the whole thing.

Friends....Pivot. PIVOT. 

Once we got it out the propped-open storm door, we rolled it like a tire to the curb. As we approached the curb,  Ellie came strolling out behind us. Both pups generally know to not run out the door even if it's open, but I don't think she could handle missing out on all the fun. We were causing quite the ruckus. 

We threw it down on the sidewalk, she hopped up and made herself at home. I don't think she understood why we were throwing away this perfectly good bed. Ellie, it was in the basement the whole time. We should have chilled out there for a while, but the Tigers are on :)

I love her! Ha! 

Why is this so great to me? Because in the midst of many moving moments that are not fun, this one was fun.  And funny.  I needed a good laugh ♥

Tornado of Change

So I knew that I get cranky when I don't run, but now I've also figured out I get stressed when I don't write. Self-diagnosing.

Although I can barely process all the emotions I am experiencing right now. There is a lot going on at once as we get closer to moving (to England. No big deal. Tiny life change. RIGHT?). I keep feeling like I'm looking at myself from the outside and analyzing how life's events (that we asked for) are just wreaking havoc on my feelings.  Really trying to just make myself laugh it off.  Why not. At least half of my emotion is excitement.  Maybe 60%.

One example...missing the dogs. This went to an extreme. We always miss them when we travel without them, but I could not WAIT to pick them up from the kennel after our last trip to Michigan. I thought to myself that it's probably just because there is so much going on and they are comforting. When I told Dave I missed them SO much this time, he said "It's probably just because of all the big changes going on right now." Yup. He gets me. We both love our puppies. I just want to cuddle with them all the time right now! The poor things don't know they are about to be moved halfway around the world and I'm using them as one of my primary means of emotional support.  Well, they have the luxury of not knowing.  Or do they? I think they will start noticing soon.

As I cuddled on the couch with Dave and the puppies the other night, watching the Tigers and drinking some wine, I wondered how the heck we were going to get to England in any kind of smooth manner. So many details to figure out still with approximately 4 weeks left.  Of course, most of those are dog details.  It's amazing that we sold our house already, but closing is a little earlier than expected so we think we'll be living in our friend's basement for a little bit. Extra friend time!? Positive. Dave's orders aren't final. We don't have plane tickets or even travel dates, let alone final plans for the dogs.  Newest development for them is that we might just fly them to Paris to save thousands of dollars (thanks England. we're off to a good start, you and I).

And then it just occured to me...all you need is love.  The 4 of us will get over there somehow and that is all that matters.  I'm going to bawl my eyes out when we walk out of this house for the last time, but I'll cherish the memories and we'll be off on another adventure together.  

And on that note- no, leaving the dogs here is not an option.  I know it's somewhat of an innocent question when people ask, but I almost cringe.

They are a part of the family.  They are a constant among all the change. When we come back from visiting friends and family far away, they are here.  When Dave is gone, they are here.  When I am gone, they are here for Dave.  Plus, they have it super good living with us. And they are so much fun.  How can we just leave them here? I would miss them terribly in England and I don't need sadness getting in the way of my fun :) Plus, they would miss out on roaming the English countryside.  That seems unfair to them.

Ok, maybe one reason to leave them here would be that England is the one country in the world that makes it extremely expensive to get them in.....frustrating, yes.  Showstopper, no.  They can make it difficult but they can't stop me.

Packaged deal

And no, you can't take one but not the other. 

Also, while on leave, there were some very important developments in the category of future Clark babies. The first thing is that we picked favorite names for both genders. 16 hour car ride, fun little activity for people in their late twenties. When we told Dave's grandparents about the names, other concerns in this department arose. Specifically, his Grandpa was concerned about us having a child in England, because this could possibly jeapordize his or her opportunity of running for president in the United States.  Naturally, this is a concern. Our kid will be awesome. Dave's brother also asked this question. Well, I've done some more research since and determined that our child would still be considered a natural-born citizen so all would be good. He or she will still be one fine presidential candidate. Everybody- sigh of relief, I know. Another huge concern we're getting: make babies soon so that they have little British accents. Come on people! Think about the timing. We'd really have to have a baby RIGHT NOW for that to work :)  But I agree, that would be kind of neat.

It was really comforting to talk to family & friends about England, our plans for where we want to live, work/school opportunities for me, possible children. Even though we will be so far away, it made me feel closer.  A lot of friends and family checking in on us and I'm so grateful.  We have people signing up to visit and we are really excited about that, too.

I kind of wish we could fast forward 4 weeks, when the tornado of change will just drop us in England. I know that will be another phase of change getting settled, but that seems more fun. I guess life isn't that easy, though. We must face all of the little details & various emotions that go with big moves.  Just like everyone else.

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Sing it, Kelly. Except that I'm not alone. But I like her passion.

Baby, Baby...

My phone, FB and residential mail has been increasingly filled with baby announcements and shower invites as of late, simultaneously making me really happy and antagonizing my feelings of wanting to have my own babies. I'm so happy for all my pregnant friends! It's an exciting time. I want to join the club. Your pregnancies are feeding my excitement. Specifically, I selfishly want my Kansas sister to have her baby before we move so I can meet her.

For now I will sit here and drink wine with my family, consisting of my husband and 2 fur children. No babies. NO BABIES. It's fine, haha. Until we get to England. But then there will be several pubs I would like to check out........dilemnas.

I remember when having kids was a distant thing in the far future. "When I'm 27 or 28, I'll have kids. Or something." And that was "forever" away. Well now I'm 28. Closer to 29. I know I'm still "young" (whatever). I'm extending my deadline.

I miss being 22, not even thinking about babies and having what seemed like forever to start. ENJOY YOUR EARLY/MID-20s, KIDS! :-p

But I also love being 28. I'm so much better than I was back then. And I don't view babies as ending your life. I'm ready. But I think me getting pregnant right now could potentially make our move a hot mess.

Maybe soon, you can find me in the pub. With my English baby. They do that there, apparently??  

I know Dave is more excited for the 3-4 year old phase so maybe we can trade off 3 years at a time. I'll take the newborn phase. Planning is important.  

Anyways, CONGRATULATIONS to all my pregnant friends. You know who you are :)

Ok, but seriously.  Where did my 20's go? It's like my alarm is going off and I'm just hitting snooze.

Friends, Canvas & Finger paint

This weekend we went to dinner with Mike & Aimee and celebrated Homecoming with the rest of Wichita's high schoolers at Red Rock Canyon. We toasted to the kids with some dirty vodka martinis. This was unplanned, but fun. My last homecoming was 11 years ago. What??? I will say, we looked less like prostitutes at our dances back in the day....and Dave was unimpressed by the guys (well they looked more like 10 year old boys) not in suits. Maybe he will feel differently when we are asked to pay for our kid's suits and dresses one day :) Then we introduced Mike and Aimee to the game Cards Against Humanity. Fortunately they did not get offended, so we can all still be good friends. Not that I thought that would be a problem. Needless to say, we had a great night with plenty of laughter and outbursts. As if that game isn't good enough, there is something even more special about playing with first-timers :)      

And yesterday...the first day of fall. Autumn. My favorite. I'll give it to Kansas....the weather really attempted to acknowledge the occasion :) It just so happened that I was getting together witth my friend Rachel for our Second Annual craft day. It was so much fun we may even throw in a second craft this season! :)

As I browsed Google and Pinterest for ideas, I have to say I was more drawn to the crafts intended for small children than to the more complicated, adult projects. Maybe my inner 5-year old just needed to get out.  I sent Rachel a few ideas but in the end we decided on this paint project. We made our trip to Michael's to get the whole list of 2 supplies we needed (canvas and finger paint :) We threw in glitter to really spice things up. We grabbed some Chipotle on the way home to fuel our bodies and creative minds (critical for a real artist.....obviously).

It was so. much. fun. catching up and using the right sides of our brains. At first, I thought it was impossible to go wrong with this craft. How can you mess up an outline of your arm/hand (which most of us learned how to do when we were 5) and a bunch of dots? Much to our surprise, the arrangement of the dots do not necessarily look like a tree. It's not a given. Hilarious. You had to be there. But with Rachel's guidance, we were able to turn random dots into trees. I am going to MISS THIS GIRL.

 

There are few people I can talk to about absolutely anything. Well, and not feel weird. We can talk about pregnancy, babies (no I'm not pregnant and no I don't have a baby, but she's about to teach me everything :), our visions of parenthood, sex scandal Dateline stories, school, work, life goals, family, it doesn't matter......so glad we met 3 years ago.  She's like my Kansas sister. We might need to craft over Skype next fall when I'm in England.  :(