Head vs. Heart

Some people primarily use one. Some people primarily use the other. I seem to let them battle it out pretty hard sometimes (maybe sometimes longer than is necessary as I worry about my decisions).

Right after my last revelation (read here for heartfelt emotions), my mind started going in high gear to determine what I would need to do to make it all happen. (Getting into WSU's physical therapy program). Volunteer hours. Study for/take GRE. Ok, I could probably get those done before November 15 (application deadline for the 2010 class). But then the pre-reqs. Take some pre-reqs...retake others. Back myself into a corner to get all As in the pre-reqs to even be considered for the P.T. program, let alone competitive. All while working full time. Why would I do this to myself? Some might feel it would be a risk worth taking, but I decided the timing isn't right.

The day before I was supposed to meet with a counselor for the P.T. program to discuss pre-requisites, I canceled. No, I'm not giving up. But hear me out. I didn't want her to potentially make me question all of my thinking over the past week...

All of my thinking from the past week culminated in another decision that made me feel more comfortable. My head had a little conversation with my heart, if you will. They compromised. I was starting to feel very overwhelmed. Putting too much on my plate and setting myself up to be disappointed in myself if everything didn't work out and I didn't get in. Basically, I want to give myself a fair shot at getting into P.T. school and now doesn't feel like the time. Plus, other things keep floating around my head....even P.A. school. I need to be more positive of the route I'm going to take before flipping my world upside down.

So the compromise is this. I'm going to continue with my Master of Education in Exercise Science while continuing to work (this is undoubtedly the right decision for my student loans). As my commitment in the Air Force draws closer to an end, I will look for jobs in my field. While I work on my Masters and get re-engaged with my field of study, I hope to focus in more on exactly what I want to do. This still allows me to do what I need to do for myself while not making snap decisions I may regret. This makes me happy.

If P.T. school is in my future, it will probably be at our next base (hopefully Spokane, Washington at Fairchild Air Force Base. School: Eastern Washington University. Yes, I've looked ahead to possible schools in the areas we could move). If I try to get in the 2012 class here, I would be staying here for an additional year to finish when Dave moves to another base in 2014. Nothing about this is simple! But that is ok...I signed up to be flexible when I married Dave (or I guess I should say I signed up to be extra flexible). It's a little stressful, but it's life. This gives me plenty of time to get more experience, knock out some pre-reqs and bump up my GPA if needed for yet another degree. Who knows, maybe I won't even need another one to do what I want to do.

Sound like a plan? I think so. Thank you head. Thank you heart. I feel great about this. Let's do this.